Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs

Maybe I should have titled this 'I Saw the Sign' ?

Life has been rather uneventful here as of late. It's the same tune: wake up, go to work, cook, clean, sleep, and repeat. Grendal and I have been wearing out due to it.  He's having trouble with work due to some racism.  It isn't directed at him in the slightest but it's remarks that have been upsetting him and the company he works for hasn't done a thing about it.  There isn't a day he comes home that he comments he nearly walked out.  Luckily he's in the process of throwing applications at the business world and we're crossing our fingers that something positive happens.

As for me, work is work.  Nothing spectacular in the Deli world of major super markets.  As a peon I have little say in what happens, and when I do point things out the higher ups in the store look at me like I'm a loon.  Unfortunately my job out look is less impressive than Grendal's.  I am some what limited to what's within reasonable walking distance of the home, especially with winter slowly creeping in.  For now I have to suck it up and hope that I don't insult one of said higher ups.

What about the title of this post? Ah, yes.  Recently I've been wanting to do something more with my tarot cards and possibly expanding other things through that.  This thought has kinda been put out in the universe and I've asked Odin and any other deity for some help or the like.  I had an old friend contact me through facebook asking if I still do readings.  I said yes and explained that we'll set something up.  It never happened, more my fault than anything else.  There went that chance.  Nothing else happened and, to be honest, I kinda forgot about what I had wanted.

Last weekend when Grendal picked me up from work he seemed a little frantic.  He told me 'Get in the car, we gotta go.'  This was strange because we didn't have anything happening that day so there was no need to be in any sort of hurry, plus earlier he wanted me to remind him that there was something we had to talk about.  Apparently what ever was happening superseded that talk.  When we drove down to the bank(approximately a block from the house) he was looking over the trees and grumbling.  Saying something about not being able to see anything.  Grendal wouldn't tell me what was going on and there I was trying to see if there was some nifty clouds floating along.  There wasn't.

The closer we got to our street the more I noticed some swallows flying about.  We usually don't have swallows hanging around the area, especially so early in the day.  So we pull into the driveway and over the property there was damn near 20 swallows swooping about and countless HUGE dragonflies doing their thing.  Grendal explained that there had been a whole lot more than what I was seeing, dragonfly wise.  It was pretty amazing, even if I didn't see the whole shebang.

What did Grendal need to talk to me about, though?  Turns out his mother and father's church is in desperate need of mediums, fortune tellers, etc.  They belong to the Spiritual Church, which is neat in it's own right but nothing for Grendal and I.  His mother was wondering if I'd be interested in doing readings.  I was a little nervous with the thought.  I mean, first and foremost I am a Heathen.  My gods are many and they are dear to me.  With the Spiritualist Church, they believe in Spirit/God.  A single deity has never sat well with me, something that I've trace back to my childhood without any explanation.  I don't want to anger my deities and enter a place of worship where I might upset the followers there due to my own path.

Grendal's mother said our differing faiths wouldn't matter.  All I would be there for would be expanding my ability to read and other things.  The only time they had to be particular about their beliefs was during their sermons or whatever they call them.  I was still leery with the idea, but I was beginning to remember that I wanted this chance.  Maybe it was another push?  N'aw.  Besides, there are times when I hear Grendal's parents and elder sister talk about their faith and it seems rather hokey.  Not to mention, too close to the Christian faith for my own comfort.

I told her I'd think about it, which she was thankful for.  A little while later I went to our computer and decided to see who/what was connected to dragonflies.  I don't know why I did so.  Maybe it was due to the fact that there had been so many of them around and that throughout my time in this home, as well as Grendal's, there has never been anything like what had been seen.

Turns out dragonflies are associated with Freyja.  She is very much associated with Seiðr, and for teaching Odin in those ways.  I think I was given one hel of a sign that I can't ignore.

And I didn't.

Tarot Card of the Day!

Deck: Viking Tarot

Today's Card: Knight of Wands

 

Meaning: Waiting for and/or receiving a 'sign'. Divining. A turning point, changing of ways.

Thoughts: This seems to correlate with my reading yesterday. More waiting and a possible sign or indication of something 'major'.  With our car being out of commission for the time being I walked to work, which is what I really needed.  Cool day, lovely breeze, and the sun shining.  Not to mention the trees and shrubs were growing wild on the bike path making for lovely scenery.  I had music on and was trying to chat with Odin.  Music on shuffle played two songs back to back that seemed to shed light on stuff.

To put things plainly, it was my way of crying out that while I can be a pain and doubtful I want and need not only Odin's company and companionship but the others as well.  The next song was the response, saying that He was with me despite all the confusion and tears.  I will even go as far as saying I felt something, a presence and a fatherly caress.

I usually don't read much into these sorts of things.  I know there are some people doing shufflemancy right now and it seems to be the new thing to try.  While curious I never really bothered but I was shown otherwise I suppose.

I would like to throw this out there, though I'm not sure how many readers I actually have. If you'd like a tarot reading, I am willing to provide(to a certain extent) without charge.  Why no charge?  I am getting to know this deck and I would feel bad giving an inaccurate reading while asking for money.  If my original deck was still in play I would charge because those guys were spot on but they needed to retire after being in use for over 10 years.

So yes, readings are available!

Tarot Card of the Day!

Thought I should do this to get to know my deck a bit better and to generally flex my muscles, so to say.  These are MY interpretations from this deck.  I've tossed aside the little manual that comes with it and never looked back.  I'm just seeing and reading what the cards are presenting.

My deck: Viking Tarot

Today's card:  Queen of Chalices  (may post picture in a later edit)

Meaning: Waiting for someone, feeling alone. A return. Something on the horizon.

Thoughts:  I think this may be in reference to myself and my waiting for something from the gods. It seems like at certain times I am out of flux and I make a mad scramble for a connection.  Last night there was a major storm and I took it as a sign that there is change in the air. Either way, I'm being told to be patient.

Does it Feel Different?

Well, it's been a week. Grendal and I were wed on the 21st of June and had a ceremony the next day for friends and family. I am now a Mrs! We've been together nearly nine years now and nothing has really changed. The odd thing is, though, the days after the ceremony we both felt different. Like I said, odd. I think it's the finality of it all. We are comfortable with each other and, in all honesty, have pretty much been a 'married' couple for some time. There was no moving in or anything like that. The big difference now is my last name has changed and there is a bunch of paperwork I have to mess with.  :P

Since the hectic times of preparing the wedding and all of that has come and gone, I should have more free time to post things. I've gone through some ideas in my head in ways of devotion and just flexing my spiritual muscles. More than likely I'll be doing a 'card of the day' type deal with my current tarot deck. I wish I could do such a thing with the runes but I have yet to really connect with it. Other things may/will follow. Probably musings and such.

Look for this stuff Wednesday!!

And the Count Down.....It Begins

So, I've hit the two months left time for the wedding. June 21/22 is coming quicker than I had imagined. I'm a bundle of nerves over many things. Food is already in order, invitations are slowly coming together, addresses are needed, and my dress is still being made. While I know everything will fall into place and this will be a day to remember, for what ever reason, I'm still nervous as hell.

A lot of people think that being married suddenly changes everything somehow. For Grendal and I it's not going to change a thing. Seriously. We've been together for nearly 9 years, living together for nearly that long. We've had our wedding jewelry for nearly a year now, wearing it every day. The only thing that is going to change between us is the legality of it all. That and we will refer to each other as 'husband' and 'wife' ala Futurama(think Hermes and LaBarbara). We are happy with each other, accept our differences, and know that our arguments/disagreements are all perfectly natural and work things out when its needed.

I've been attempting to write some more but something isn't clicking. Makes me sad but I think I have to put my writing aside for a while. My muse and inspiration is just kinda not there anymore.

Also I've been attempting to get closer to Odin. Talking with Him, using my tarots, and what not. My cards are rather good and while I don't read as often as I want to, nor have people to do readings for, it's a little rocky. Things seem to be clearing up when communicating with Him. I don't know if it has any connection but I've been getting restful sleep as well! One big thing that I asked Odin was what should I do to really show my devotion. Should I create something? Perhaps take on a new craft or work on one that I have. The cards pretty much pointed to my wedding with Grendal as a show of devotion. I do know that I am setting aside some food for both the gods and the Wights, so perhaps that has something to do with it. Either way, there is some connection to my wedding! Happy day.

One last thing: the weather here is ridiculous. I had ONE WEEK to walk/bike to work since the changing of the season and ever since then it's been rainy. From the drive way I can still peer through the trees and peep through the trees across the highway to see the river. People had to evacuate houses and some houses are mostly underwater. Never understood why people really want homes along the river. While it is bad that peoples' homes have been flooded, we need(ed) the rain. Last year we were in drought conditions and this is a good start. While we're still dry (kinda hard to wrap my head around that with all this freakin' rain) it's a step in the right direction. Maybe a garden will be doable this year.

-Djarfskald

A Wee Bit of the Blues

I don't know what it is about today but Grendal and I had one hel of a time waking up. We slept through nearly all of his alarms. Got out of my stupor when Grendal nudged me and asked if I'd make him coffee for the morning. So, even after dragging my groggy butt out of bed and having a cup of coffee myself, I feel like I'm dragging. I don't know if it's the weather because I know I had gotten a decent amount of sleep. No waking up in the middle of the evening, but I'm still just feeling like a bump on a log right now.

This week is gonna be a busy one at work. I have nearly 40 hours, which is rare for us part time peons.  I've been feeling a little bit more like I'm in charge of this around the deli, for some odd reason, and really feeling my age. This past Sunday, while a short shift of four hours was not a happy one for a moment. Why? I had one of the higher ups refer to me as 'the help'.  : |     What now? First off, I don't get paid nearly enough to be called 'the help' nor am I watching the children or cleaning the house of a wealthy person. My opinion of the man quickly slipped into the negative. I knew he wasn't the greatest guy but it had been all decent business when he'd show up. Nope. Not now. The guy can bite me and the next time he calls me as such I will say that if he wants to call me 'the help' he needs to increase my wage a few bucks.  I'll even wear my serious face.

We've gotten some more snow around here, so my previous comments of 'Hey, it looks like spring' seems to have been thrown off. Still seeing those birds, though, and I'm able to walk outside without the cloak nearly as much as I needed during the colder days.

Touching on the notion of feeling my age, it seems like my gaming group and I are becoming 'adults'.  Out of the eight of us our age range from 21 to the mid- to late 30s.  Next year will be my 30th birthday, which I plan to have a wonderful party.  But yes, we're becoming adults.  One of the guys has finally gotten a job, in the Chicago area, in the area of massage which means his time with us on Sunday is gonna come to an end(at least for the time being). Another one of the guys is attending college in the Chicago area and his classes this semester has kept him away. The youngest of us has finally gotten a job and it seems like she'll be getting the evening shift on gaming night. Then there's Grendal and I: about to get married and Grendal having his eyes set on getting the job with the railway. We're growing up and I'm honestly a little worried. My Sunday group is made up of the people I consider my friends. Honestly, the only friends I have and the ones that are within reasonable driving distance. Work and life is pulling us apart, which I don't like.

Maybe that's what has me like this? Who knows.

I've been building a good relationship with my tarot deck. They seem to like me and their personality is coming to light(when I'm working with them, my attention is on THEM, nothing else). I need to reconnect with Odin somehow. :\  Perhaps an offering or just some time with him. Winter is usually a good time for me. For the first time I'm finding myself want Spring to come.

That's One Way to Do It

Well, today is the changing of the seasons.  After this season, Grendal and I will be married!

Speaking of seasons, it doesn't really LOOK like spring.  There is snow on the ground still, it's barely in the teens outside, and there isn't a bud in sight.  While most people would say the above are marks AGAINST the coming of spring, I think they haven't noticed the little signs that's its creeping in.  The Canadian Geese are returning home.  I hear them and watch them whenever I'm out with Yuko.  I've also spotted a Robin bopping in the yard, as well as some European Starling that seemed to come out of nowhere.  The little birds that we've been feeding all winter are starting to shed their weight and their colors are getting brighter.  I do suppose that most of my friends are 'city' dwellers and/or don't really pay attention to it.  It's a little hard for me not to since we have a HUGE window in the dinning room facing the feeders.  :p


As a way to celebrate the changing of the seasons, as well as our impending marriage, Grendal and I began the mead for our wedding!  While it may not be aged properly, we will have our homemade brew for the of age attendees.  I thought today was fitting due to the holiday as well as it being Wednesday.  With Odin presiding over today and the area of mead, what better time to do this?  I plan on leaving a hearty cup of mead for Odin and the other deities, as well as the wights, during the ceremony.  They will also have a nice plate of food and, if all goes well, some cake too!  Grendal is more than happy and willing to have this done which makes me ecstatic.

Grendal letting Yuko examine what's going on.

My new tarot set came in....as well as a rune set.  I decided to treat myself to a deck and thought that I may as well toss in a rune set, since I was going to get one eventually.  I haven't messed with either just and I must say I'm nervous.  It's been YEARS (about 13) since I received a brand new deck to call mine, and I don't know how to go about it.  While I know I should just dive in (same goes for the runes), I want to make sure everything is just right.  My first deck last me many years before they decided they wished to retire.  I want this deck to be very much the same.

As for the runes, well, I don't know what to do.  I guess I'm gonna wing it, do some searches, and hope that all goes well.

It's the Little Things

Finished the 30 days of Devotion yesterday and I think, while I did have to double up, that I've moved forward on my spiritual quest.  I've grown closer to Odin in our own way.  Now I just need to keep chugging forward with this.

Last night culminated in a strange but insanely happy moment.  I have this odd habit of finding recipes in magazines in work's break room and ripping out said recipes for later.  I have a little shoe box filled with things from making naturally colored cream cheese frosting and sweet lavender scones to preparing a holiday ham.  Grendal, while happy that I was finding some awesome recipes, was getting annoyed that they didn't have a proper spot, save for a shoe box.  So what does he do?  He finds a three ring binder and some clear page sleeves and hands it to me.  "Make your cook book."  I had balked at the idea in earlier instances but as I sat down and started, I felt insanely giddy.  About an hour later I had a makeshift cook book.  Somewhere in the back of my head I saw it as my own grimoire, which is odd.  While I never considered myself a Kitchen Witch I liked the idea, and seeing how Asatru is about home and family, it kinda works out.  Either way, I was over joyed and have these recipes set up in a lovely fashion.

I've been having the urge to do some tarot readings in general but it's starting to seem like my cards and I aren't clicking anymore.  The current deck I use wasn't mine in the beginning and was, in fact, a deck Grendal gave me.  I felt from the get go that the deck was reluctant to work with me and when we did work together, things went well.  Lately, though, not so much.  My original deck has been retired and kept in a safe place, and I think it's time to do the same with this deck.  Actually, I think it's over do.  So I've been eying decks and I think I found one that can work (Grendal agrees).  All I have to do is order them, hopefully tonight, and begin again.  Eventually, I'll begin working with Runes but I'm a little nervous.  I'll do it, though.  I think flexing my divination muscles may be something useful if not healthy.